April is Stress awareness month by Joy Wisdom

Do we really have a handle on mental health? Epidemics exist, fact is we live in a society of stress, people do not understand why or how to fix ! 

Trauma and stress go hand in hand and data shows that we have an epidemic of stress within society  affecting young and old. From my personal and professional experience we have a lot to learn about stress and anxiety.  The reasons ‘why’ are not ever apparent and approaches today do not take into consideration the history of the person to find the real core reasons.

The integrated Psycho Somoto approach is focused upon the person instead of the symptoms or outcomes of anxiety or stress brings.  So many hidden factors are present, underlying, unaware and normal for the person, often buried deeply and long forgotten. From my perspective talking is not enough and only creates more biochemical repetition accumulating rather than dealing with the true cause and elimination of emotional drives. Causing the domino effect people live.

Essentially, we each have our own stress coping level formed in formation. Added or subtracted from how we are treated, acknowledged, nurtured or loved in life. The impacts do not go away, and awareness is urgently required to understand the deep complex conditions we can live, suppressing and blind to the adverse experiences engaged in life.

Trauma is received in many ways and there is no black or white scenario.

Trauma is unique to individual and often comes from childhood vulnerable experiences, even from formation. In other words we can be born with low levels of stress underlying from birth and womb formation. Logically, foetal origins and hormonal impacts from cortisol, stress chemicals received or churned out by mum will set our coping strategies and base lines for stress.

However, childhood adverse trauma has a direct correlation to development of major diseases in adulthood. Which means if we deal with stress and trauma early we could prevent and avoid health conditions later in life.  Studies have shown lifespan risks are imminent, life is shortened when intergenerational repetition is involved. Same outcome as nothing has changed! For example:

Neglect, Neglect emotional or physical is a big stress maker.

How well bond when born with parents,  how we are treated when born, cuddled or left to cry. Traumatic childhood experiences have long term influences on health.

Violence, either witnessed, observed or received is involved in underlying PTSD and high levels of stress.

Abuse, emotional, sexual or physical lived or observed leaves deep complex trauma conditions. PTSD, sleep deprivation and long term health concerns.

Household dysfunctions, violence, drugs, alcohol abuse, mental health or depression in household. Science now realises if mother has PPD, PTSD, depression after or during pregnancy, her infant will be affected. Infants cognitive development compromised and levels of depression, anxiety have been found underlying.

Shows how imperative early years are to get right and eliminate intergenerational impacts. Love and nurturing is key for all of us, when we don’t receive, that’s when trauma sets in. Challenging scenarios follow in health and psychologically.

Anxiety and stress often arrives as the symptoms creep up on us as we receive surges of biochemical and hormonal influences. Keeping us on the ground hog day repeat option.

The domino repeat causes internal stress and inflammation involved in chronic disorders, such as Arthritis, Fibromyalgia, CFS, aches and pains, joint issues, and self-perpetuating disorders due to inflammation and stress hormones!

Breaking the cycle is key.

Dissolve and Resolve Emotions (D.A.R.E) Body-Mind-Emotion integrated therapy, offers client bespoke Psycho Somoto reduction solutions, tests and 1-2-1 health plans to eliminate strongholds of mind and emotion, offering prevention and jettersoning intergenerational repeat.  Because PTSD, stress, depression and anxiety will be found at the core of every disorder.

Joy advocates Ditch it Don’t live it…

See D.A.R.E - Dissolve And Resolve Emotions videos on website

www.allonus.co.uk

Understanding Stress, Trauma & the Need for Deeper Solutions

Stress and trauma are intrinsically linked, affecting individuals across all ages. Today’s society faces an epidemic of stress and anxiety, yet most approaches overlook the root causes hidden in personal history. From both personal and professional experience, it’s clear that we need to shift focus—from managing symptoms to understanding the individual beneath them.

The Integrated Psycho-Somoto approach looks beyond the surface, recognizing how buried emotional imprints, often formed in childhood or even in utero, shape our stress responses. Talking therapies alone can reinforce stress pathways through repeated biochemical cycles. True healing requires dismantling emotional triggers and rewriting the body-mind’s learned patterns.

Stress coping mechanisms are established early, influenced by how we are nurtured, seen, or neglected. Trauma—often originating from adverse childhood experiences such as abuse, neglect, or household dysfunction—can shape long-term health outcomes, including chronic pain, autoimmune conditions, and mental health disorders.

Foetal development is also impacted by maternal stress, depression, and cortisol levels, predisposing individuals to lifelong stress sensitivity. Intergenerational trauma leaves a legacy unless actively addressed.

Dissolve and Resolve Emotions (D.A.R.E) therapy offers a personalised, integrated solution through testing, 1-2-1 care, and somatic-emotional release to dissolve entrenched trauma and prevent disease. Breaking the cycle is not only possible—it’s essential.

Emotional and Mental Health Outcomes of Violence and Abuse

Violence and abuse leave deep, lasting imprints on mental and emotional health. Whether experienced directly or witnessed, these events contribute to chronic stress, emotional dysregulation, and long-term psychological disorders. Research shows that trauma from abuse isn’t just emotional—it becomes physiological, affecting how the brain and body respond to future stress.

Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), such as physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, or living in a violent or dysfunctional household, are directly linked to higher risks of anxiety, depression, PTSD, and suicidal thoughts in adulthood. The original ACE study found that individuals with 4 or more ACEs were 4.5 times more likely to experience depression and 12 times more likely to attempt suicide.

Abuse also alters the stress response system. Constant exposure to cortisol and adrenaline changes the brain’s architecture, particularly in areas responsible for memory, emotional regulation, and decision-making. Survivors may struggle with sleep disorders, emotional detachment, trust issues, and hypervigilance.

Women and children are especially vulnerable. The WHO reports that 1 in 3 women globally have experienced physical or sexual violence, with increased risks of mental health disorders and substance abuse. In children, long-term exposure to abuse or household dysfunction increases the risk of developmental delays, cognitive issues, and behavioural problems.

Emotional and mental health outcomes are not just byproducts—they are core symptoms of unresolved trauma. Effective, integrated interventions are vital to prevent the domino effect of lifelong health issues rooted in early violence and abuse.

Response 1

Living with someone who has depression can significantly affect the emotional, psychological, and even physical well-being of those around them—especially close family members, partners, and children. The atmosphere of the home can become heavy, unpredictable, or emotionally distant, often leading to increased stress, anxiety, and a higher risk of mental health challenges in others.

Impact on Partners and Spouses

Research shows that partners of individuals with depression are more likely to experience emotional strain, caregiver fatigue, and depression themselves. A study published in BMC Public Health found that spouses of people with depression had a 2 to 3 times greater risk of developing depression themselves. The burden of emotional caregiving, communication breakdown, and reduced intimacy all contribute to the strain.

Impact on Children

Children living with a parent who has depression are especially vulnerable. According to the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), children of depressed parents are 3 to 4 times more likely to develop depression or anxiety disorders. They may also show increased behavioural problems, lower academic performance, and difficulty forming relationships.

The British Journal of Psychiatry reports that maternal depression during a child’s early years is associated with a 70% increased risk of emotional disorders in adolescence.

Family Dynamics

Living with someone with depression often leads to disrupted routines, emotional withdrawal, and reduced communication. Family members may walk on eggshells, suppress their own emotions, or feel helpless. Chronic stress in these environments can lead to physical symptoms such as fatigue, headaches, and weakened immunity.

In summary: Depression is not isolated to the individual—it affects the whole system. Support for family members and integrated mental health care is essential for long-term healing and stability.

Let me know if you’d like this tailored for a talk, blog, or client handout.

Response 2

Living with someone who has depression can significantly impact the mental, emotional, and even physical health of others in the household. The effects ripple through relationships, routines, and wellbeing—especially when the depression is untreated or chronic.

Emotional and Psychological Impact

Family members, particularly partners and children, often experience:

• Emotional exhaustion from constant caregiving or walking on eggshells.

• Anxiety and stress, especially when communication breaks down.

• Guilt or self-blame, especially in children, who may internalize the parent’s distress.

• Feelings of isolation due to social withdrawal in the household.
  

A study published in Psychiatric Services (2013) found that spouses of individuals with depression are 3 times more likely to develop depression themselves. The emotional toll of trying to support someone who is emotionally unavailable or irritable can lead to burnout or compassion fatigue.

Impact on Children

The consequences for children are even more profound. According to the CDC and National Child Traumatic Stress Network:

• Children of depressed parents are 2 to 4 times more likely to experience depression, anxiety, and behavioural issues.

• Maternal depression, even in infancy, can impair attachment and cognitive development.

• In households with parental depression, nearly 50% of children show signs of emotional or behavioural problems.
  

Household Dysfunction

Living with untreated depression can also contribute to:

• Increased conflict or emotional neglect.

• Disruption in routines (meals, sleep, school/work consistency).

• Risk of economic strain, especially when depression impacts work productivity.

  
  

Conclusion

Living with someone suffering from depression doesn’t only affect the individual—it can create a climate of chronic stress that impacts every member of the household. Awareness, support, and intervention are crucial for breaking the cycle and promoting recovery for the whole family.

CLIENT HANDOUT

The Ripple Effects of Depression in the Home

Living with someone who has depression affects more than just the individual struggling. It impacts the emotional, mental, and physical wellbeing of everyone in the household. Understanding these effects can help you take steps to support both your loved one and yourself.

Emotional & Mental Effects on Family Members:

• Constant worry, helplessness, or guilt

• Emotional exhaustion and compassion fatigue

• Increased anxiety and risk of depression

• Disrupted sleep and emotional withdrawal
  

Impact on Children:

• 2 to 4 times more likely to develop depression or anxiety

• Behavioural issues and difficulties in school

• Feelings of neglect or self-blame

• Cognitive and emotional development delays
  

Key Statistics:

• Spouses of individuals with depression are 3x more likely to develop depression (Psychiatric Services, 2013)

• Nearly 50% of children in homes with parental depression show emotional or behavioural issues (CDC, NCTSN)

• 1 in 5 UK adults report feeling alone in managing someone else’s mental health
  

What Helps?

• Prioritising awareness, acknowledging your own mental health needs

• Seeking specialist emotional release or integrated Therapy support

• Encouraging open communication

• Getting informed about depression and treatment options

  
  
  
  

Depression is a shared experience in the home. Healing starts with understanding, boundaries, and support for everyone involved. ______________________________________________________________________

BLOG POST

When One Hurts, We All Hurt: The Hidden Impact of Depression on Families

Depression doesn’t just affect the person going through it. It casts a shadow over the entire household. From the emotional toll on partners to the developmental impacts on children, depression has far-reaching consequences that often go unnoticed.

Family members may feel helpless, anxious, and emotionally depleted. Spouses can feel like they’re losing the person they once knew. Children, especially, are at risk: studies show they are up to 4 times more likely to experience mental health struggles themselves if a parent suffers from depression. The emotional climate becomes fragile, with increased tension, emotional withdrawal, and disrupted routines.

Research shows:

• Spouses are 3 times more likely to develop depression themselves.

• Nearly 50% of children in such environments exhibit emotional or behavioural problems.
  

If depression is left untreated, the home environment can become fractured, a breeding ground for further dysfunction: isolation, economic strain, and breakdown in relationships. 

**But it doesn’t have to stay that way. Support for the entire household is key. Therapy, open conversations, education, and shared coping strategies can rebuild emotional resilience. Recognising everyone is affected creates space for healing and support systems to thrive. Joy

No one should carry it alone. Help is not just for the one who is hurting, but for those quietly breaking around them, too.